Written by Tim Wilson
They got el(E)even of us in a Jim Walter home / They (A) got your genes, and my chromosomes / But these (F#m) young-ens are about to drive me out of my (B) skull / They (E) lost their minds and you've lost your looks / You (A) think I've slept with the telephone book / But to (F#m) tell you the truth, I'm only half way through the (B) Q's / And if you try to (A) save this marriage ag(B)ain / I'll (E) kill you You're (E) louder than an outboard Evenrouge / You (A) got us living off little-league food / You're (E) cooking corn dogs for a (F#m) fourty-five year old (B) man / And you've been (E) laying around like I'm a nurses aid / I (A) oughta draw checks from Medicaid / You (E) lay on the sofa, till your (F#m) butt turns black and (B) blue / And if you try to (E) save this marriage (B) again / I'll (E) kill you (A)Call your lawyer, get him on the phone / (E) Ya'll can split everything I own / (F#m) Divorce is rough / And there's hell to pay / But (B) we don't own anything anyway / Since you (E) turned me in to the Internal Reve(A)nue / And if you try to save this marraige ag(B)ain / I'll (E) kill you Solo (A)Call your lawyer, tell him everything / (E)Man, that fat lady sure could sing / Ta(F#m)ke the damned house / I wish you would / There's a (B) Hooter girl waiting in my pickup truck / She's a (E) 38 D, and she just turned twenty(A)-two / And if you try to save this marraige ag(B)ain / I'll (E) kill you And if you try to (A) save this marriage ag(B)ain / I'll (E)kill you